The Piper: (singing)

"OH, MY FRIENDS, DO YOU SEE THIS ROAD
STRETCHED HERE BEFORE YOU?

NO, PLEASE, THAT WAS JUST A RHETORICAL QUESTION
BUT I FEAR THERE IS MUCH HERE THAT HASN’T BEEN MENTIONED
DO YOU KNOW THE DANGERS THAT LURK AND AWAIT YOU?

MONSTERS AND THIEVES, MURDEROUS ENEMIES
BUT REMEMBER MY FRIENDS THE BEST REMEDY
IS SONG.

LIFE’S MUCH EASIER WITH A SONG
JUST COME AND SING ALONG
IF EVER A STRANGER
PRESENTS YOU WITH DANGER
REMEMBER THERE’S NOTHING WRONG
WITH A SONG!

OH, MY FRIENDS, YOU MAY FIND
YOURSELF LOCKED IN A DUNGEON
AND A GUARD TO GET BY, YOU COULD REACH FOR HIS TRUNCHEON
AND BE GONE IN A FLASH FOR HIS BRAINS YOU WOULD BLUDGEON

THERE’S A MUCH BETTER WAY
TO SET YOURSELVES FREE.
A STEALTHY INVOCATION
THAT IS FAR MORE DISCRETE
A BLOODLESS ONE THAT LEAVES NO TRAIL
TAKE IT FROM ME.

IT’S A SONG!
LIFE’S MUCH EASIER WITH A SONG
JUST COME AND SING ALONG
IF YOU FIND THAT ONE DAY
THERE’S SOMEONE IN YOUR WAY
THE BEST WAY TO GET THEM GONE...

DO YOU WANT TO MOVE PEOPLE AND INFLUENCE FRIENDS?
THEN TAKE IT FROM ME, I’VE GOT THE MEANS TO YOUR ENDS.

YAH!"

(Flute Solo)

"OH, MY FRIENDS YOU MAY BE IN THE COURT OF A KING,
WITH COURTIERS FAWNING AND KISSING HIS RING.
AND NO WAY TO BE HEARD, EXCEPT FOR ONE THING.
IT’S A LITTLE SOMETHING I’VE ALREADY MENTIONED...

A LYRICAL WAY TO CUT THROUGH THE TENSION
AND AT ONCE GRAB COURT’S UNDIVIDED ATTENTION:

IT’S A SONG!

LIFE’S MUCH EASIER WITH A SONG
JUST COME AND SING ALONG
IF YOU’RE EVER EMBROILED
WITH SOMEONE WHO’S ROYAL;
IF YOU’RE CAUGHT IN A PICKLE
MY FRIEND YOU CAN’T BE FICKLE;
IF YOU’RE STUCK IN A PINCH
IT’S ALL JUST A CINCH;
JUST GET WHAT YOU WANT...

IN SONG!"

Gamemaker:
Suddenly! An arrow flies through The Piper’s face! (SFX) And he falls down dead at your feet!

Players:
"Ahhhh!"

Jocasta:
"They REALLY didn’t like that song!"